HOLY COW!

Today has been so stressful! Between school and trying to figure out how to live on one income, I feel like I am at my wits end. My professor's informed all of us senior elementary ed. majors that we aren't allowed to work during our student teaching year. This has been one of those painful experiences that makes me lean on God. As I sat in chapel I let the words of the worship songs flow over me. One of these songs proclaimed: I called out, and you answered! You came to me rescue and I wanna be where you are! Those words are so powerful and I am trying to absorb the true meaning of them. I have realized that I do want to be where God is. And he does answer when I call and He rescues me! Our financial struggles are still before us but I have faith that God will provide even if I can't see the answer ahead of me. Just a thought to remember for the day I guess.

The Power of Perspective

Today I was visiting my husband at work. He works at a truck accessory shop. While I was here there was a father here with his three young children. The situation quickly got to the point of explosive with the oldest daughter yelling and the young father not doing much about it. My husband sat there and quietly exchanged those knowing glances that clearly stated "our children will never behave that way!" Throughout the course of it I kept thinking that the dad just needed to take a firm hand with this out of control child. While listening to the child scream at her father about how she just wanted her mother her father simply stated "I am sorry but she is the one that left and I am the one that stayed so I am all you have." My heart broke and I immediately asked God for forgivness. How heartbreaking for the both of them. Please pray for this family that we will never know but whose lives will certainly be difficult.

High School Girls Small Group

I have taken over the high school girls small group with our Wednesday night program. At first I volunteered for it because I felt God leading me to it. I didn't want to but I felt a peace about it as soon as I submitted. Wednesday night came and I was not really nervous but I didn't have a good attitude. I prayed that God would sooth my mind and spirit and guide me through this evening. As the girls came in and sat on the various couches I felt led to have everyone to sit on the floor. This wasn't something major but I felt that since the topic was servanthood and humility it would help to foster this if we were all on the same level and were able to see each other and hear each other easily. Things started off awkward. No one really knew each other or really cared to get to know each other. By the end of the night these girls had dug deeply into the topic and really applied the topic to the different areas of their life. By the end I felt like I had learned from them more than they had learned from me. How amazing God is to take such a frightening situation and turn it into a learning experience. I have realized that it was very arrogant of me to feel that I could bestow any wisdom on these girls. God was in charge all along and I praise Him for that! I am looking forward to next week and getting to know these girls a little more and to find out a little more about God and hopefully get to tell Him a little more about me. This is one thing that I have challenged myself to doing. My cousin pointed out to me that even though God already knows us, He wants us to tell Him about ourselves and in so doing, we learn more about Him. I am excited to see what more I find out about myself and the Lord as the days go on!

My First Blog Ever

Well, my mom started blogging awhile ago and I was unsure about it. After reading her blogs I felt drawn to do likewise. You see my mom is the woman I strive to become. She is a pastor's wife and makes it look like something I would enjoy being. Since I now am technically a pastor's wife, I am trying to frantically absorb all I can so that I will be able to support my husband's ministry with teens. I always swore I would never marry a youth pastor, or a pastor of any kind. Not that I dislike the church, I love the church, I have just always thought that they deserve a better leader. My mom always said I would marry a youth pastor and I thought I had won that argument when I married Jayson, a business major. God must have giggled a little when He called Jayson into ministry a year into our marriage. Although I am not yet at peace with this, I am content to continue with my journey with God to help me to become the help mate that my husband needs so that he is as effective of a pastor as my dad has been. I have found that although life sitll has it's ups and downs, it is much more enjoyable with God in the pilot seat. I also feel that through this journey I might be able to become more like my mother, but more importantly I will become more like my Father. Grace is not something that has come naturally to me but something I have strived for all my life. As I have embarked on this journey I will always remember that "God's grace is sufficient" and that is my hope as I endeavor to live by grace.